The Daily Mommy vs Teacher Battle ~ part 2

In part one of the daily mommy vs  teacher battle, peace is being made by allowing our children to be able to get outside and play each day.  That was simple enough!  Now, let’s move on to something more substantial.  Today, in part two, we deal with relationship building opportunities.

 

Battle #2

Teacher – “We must stick to the academic tasks and stay on target today.”

Mommy – “How can I find adequate time to build strong relationships with the children and for them to grow closer together as well?”

 

Truce #2
- Schedule times for older kids to take a 15-20 minute break from their schoolwork to play with or read to the younger kids. 

- Be encouraged by the natural tendencies the children have to talk, play, read, hug, and wrestle with each other – even if those few extra minutes ‘interrupt’  their schoolwork.

readingtotoddler
(above: from 2 years ago….our K child choosing
to read to her 17 month old sister)

- From time to time, invite the whole crew to dress up, choose hand puppets, or design some stick puppets and work together to put on a performance to share with daddy. (Of course, as in our family, the kids may take charge and come up with this idea on their own.) Be willing to give them time for planning, working through issues with one another, and for expressing their creativity!

-Do chores as a family – all working as a team toward achieving a goal.

chores2

(above:  Last year, even our 2 year old enjoyed
helping by dusting the baseboards.)

-Institute a regular family fun night.  Play games, watch a movie, or have a Bible focused evening – all along with a fun snack!

- Have several fun educational days scattered throughout the year (100th day, Olympics related, family tea parties, etc) to maintain excitement in learning and to create family memories.

 teaparty
(above: our oldest trying out chopsticks at our family Asian themed tea)

-Make sure mama is remembering to wear a smile, is using pleasant tones, is looking at the children when they speak, and is giving hugs and encouraging feedback.  This will go a long way to building a positive relationship!

- Use a ‘Mama and Me’ notebook to write back and forth in to develop another form of communication to strengthen the bonds of trust and transparency. (I think this will be especially beneficial as the kids get older, but it is a good habit to start now.)

 

What is our goal?   Building family unity (in the midst of ‘doing’ school and life) so that we might glorify Christ!

May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.  (Romans 15:5-6)  

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.  Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.   (Ephesians 4:2-3)

How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!  (Psalm 133:1)

Follow the entire series… 
The Daily Mommy vs Teacher Battle
Part 1 ~ outside time
Part 2 ~ strengthening relationships (current post)
Part 3 ~ life skills
Part 4 ~ including the younger children
Part 5 ~ persevering

The Daily Mommy vs Teacher Battle ~ part 1

Like other homeschool moms with a handful of children ranging in age from toddler to entering double digits, I have two very important and intense roles that I must play each day – at the exact same time. 

I am a mother  AND  I am a teacher. 

This is both a daily blessing and a daily battle.  I realize that my roles as a mother and teacher are not really conflicting.  However, in my heart, they often feel that way.  This may be due to neglecting prayer for wisdom each day, believing lies about what my role as a mother and teacher should be, or by setting unreasonable expectations for myself and/or the children.  I truly love my children and I love home educating them, but some days I feel like I’m losing on both the mommy and the teacher front …. and sometimes, I feel as if my heart is being torn in two. 

Other homeschool mamas, do you ever feel this too?

Over the next several days, I will be sharing a few of the battles that are waged each day between the teacher and the mommy in me.  I’ll also be attempting to provide a few simple and practical solutions or ‘truces’  that might ease the sparring between the two and to help settle the conflict =) .

Feel free to comment and to add ways you’ve dealt with these issues in your own homeschool!

 

Battle #1
(This is actually the simplest battle to solve, and you’ll probably laugh…)

Teacher – “We must fit in all of our academic areas this day.”

Mommy – “The children and I must find time to breathe in the fresh air and be able to run and play outside!”

 

Truce #1
-Schedule daily outside recess, preferably a time when all of us, including mommy, can go outside!  Most public schools have recess for children.  So, our homeschooled kids (and younger siblings) can too!  Just because we are the only family in our neighborhood with children outside during school hours doesn’t mean it’s wrong!  Recess and play time outside has great benefits.  So, let the kids have some free play, suggest some fun relay races, kick the ball around, etc.  Just take a break from the school work and get outside!  The books and assignments can wait until after recess and everyone will be more refreshed (even mommy).

outside  (above:  our sweet 18 mo old learning to toss a ball earlier this year)

- Grab some clipboards, paper, and pencils, put the younger ones in a stroller or wagon, and head outdoors for a nature expedition!

  toddlerwagonfallleafhunt
(above: from 4 years ago…our almost 2 year old enjoying
some fresh air and nature exploration as his sisters go on a leaf hunt!)

 

Feel the gentle breeze.  Breathe deeply.  Enjoy God’s creation.
It is OKAY to take a break in the middle of, gulp, a school day!

 

Follow the entire series… 
The Daily Mommy vs Teacher Battle
Part 1 ~ outside time
(current post)
Part 2 ~ strengthening relationships
Part 3 ~ life skills
Part 4 ~ including the younger children
Part 5 ~ persevering

Patience

So many times, when I tell another mom that I homeschool our children, the first response I hear is…"Oh, I could never do that.  I just don’t have the patience!" 

Can I let you in on a little secret?  (Neither. do. I.)   Well, maybe it is not quite a secret since my children could easily attest to it and my husband knows it quite well, too.  More importantly, I know it and, of course, nothing can be hidden from my Lord.

While trying to instill a love for learning, encourage strong friendships among siblings that will last, discipline in love, and achieve academic training, we are building our childrens’ minds and character AND God is shaping ours.  Whether that means molding me to be more flexible, more patient, more gentle, more loving, less self absorbed……. whew!

Becoming a mother and choosing to be with our precious children 24/7/365 has a way of amplifying my sinfulness and creates daily opportunities for the necessary refining process to take place.  I am willing to let Christ grow me in this area through the trials, challenges, joys, frustrations, and uncertainties as we walk on this journey we call homeschooling.  It is by no means easy and I definitely do not have the needed patience, naturally, ingrained in me.   I am starting to realize that I am also being homeschooled as it is Christ who is gradually (v e r y  gradually) making the necessary character changes in me. 

volcano(Above: a recent volcano experiment….
Yes, an inactive volcano may look calm and peaceful enough, but at any time, it may rumble and roar, spilling forth gases, ash, and hot lava that lie beneath the surface – affecting all those in the surrounding area)

A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly.       (Proverbs 14:29)

A man’s wisdom gives him patience.  It is to his glory to overlook an offense.        (Proverbs 19:11)

Be completely humble and gentle.  Be patient, bearing with one another in love.      (Ephesians 4:2)

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.         (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

In the above verses, patience seems to be linked to understanding, wisdom, humbleness, forgiveness, gentleness, contentment, and love.  Oh Lord, may you continue to train and teach me so that  I may possess these qualities in increasing measure, demonstrating them graciously in our home.

 

Addition:  I recently came across the following blog entry and I think it states it so well…  My Curriculum is My Kids

Isaiah 41:10

Seeds Family Worship has a song called ‘Do Not Fear’ based on Isaiah 41:10 from their Seeds of Courage CD.  I have been singing it for several weeks – and I think I will continue to sing it in order to ingrain this promise from God’s Word!

So do not fear, for I am with you.  Do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you.  I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

In my previous posts Come Follow Me, Part 1 and Come Follow Me, Part 2, I shared how God has shown Himself faithful in the past and what we believe is His call to us for the future.  If you have read these, then you are aware that our family embarked on the application process to be missionaries.    Well, months later, after much prayer, reflection, interviews, and some shaky knees, we have received word that we have been accepted as members to Wycliffe Bible Translators!

Wycliffe’s vision is to see God’s Word accessible to all people in the language that they understand best so that everyone has an opportunity to have an intimate and life changing relationship with Jesus Christ. 

Our future assignment: No, we are not gifted as translators!  However, my husband will have the opportunity to use his skills in software development to assist in the process of translating the gospel into the many heart languages of unreached people groups.  He will be working with a team to develop specialist computer software for use by Bible translators and language workers worldwide. This will allow for faster, more accurate, and more meaningful Bible translations.

Our next steps:  Training!  In addition to our current family responsibilities and jobs, we will be taking missions training for the next year – a Perspectives course and online Wycliffe training as a couple, onsite training at Wycliffe headquarters as a family, and SIL training for my husband in the upcoming summer.   Partnership Development!  We will also be seeking much needed prayer and financial support.

Our needs: 
– For God to raise up a team of ministry partners –both prayer and financial supporters
– That in the midst of missions training and our ongoing family roles, we would have spiritual protection, strength, endurance, and wisdom
– For trust in Christ alone, a continued sense of calling, and an abiding peace as we face uncertainties and meet transitions
– For growth in prayer as a couple and family
– For diligence (especially when tired) in training, disciplining, and discipling the children

Honestly, I keep having to fight my knee jerk reaction to pull back, scream no, and hold on tight to where we are and to what we have in an effort to protect myself and our children – for my desire for stability, comfort in the known, and for being the overseer of MY time, MY resources, MY energy, etc.   In reality though, that is faulty thinking – to think that I am in control.  Everything we currently have has come from HIM.  Everything we need in the future comes from HIM.  If this is truly what God desires for our family, who am I to say no and to question if HE will provide yet again?   I know that HE will provide all things in all situations – within the known and in the unforeseen – time, energy, resources, wisdom for decisions, and prayer support. 

For my Lord will uphold me with His righteous right hand.  It is there, in Christ alone, that I find strength, rest, peace, and security.

The Joy Stealer

faces1

It is great to learn from other homeschoolers!  I love to read blogs written by other homeschool moms.  I like being able to get a glimpse into their day, see how they have organized their home and learning environment, see the types of curriculum they are using, and read their reviews of curriculum that they have used in the past.  I will often see an idea, ponder it, determine whether it might be something beneficial for our family, and then possibly try to implement it in our own homeschool.

While gleaning ideas from the generous sharing though, whether in real life or online, I have to be very careful to not let comparison creep in.  Oh, my friend so and so’s child can do this and this already, homeschool blog mom is doing X,Y,Z with her kids and I can barely do A!  It can start an emotional roller coaster in my mind and add an unnecessary burden- a load that I am not meant to carry.

Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else,  for each one should carry his own load.
Galatians 6:4-5   

I start thinking… Am I doing enough, doing the correct types of things, using the right curriculum?  How can we fit this and this into our days, too?  Why can’t I seem to do it all like so and so?  Learning from, being encouraged, and growing from the sharing of other homeschoolers is wonderful.  Coveting and being overly critical of my choices for our family because of it is not.

faces3faces4faces2

I have read somewhere that comparing our homeschool with other families is a joy stealer and that Christ is the true standard.  Wow. That is a statement that I truly need to let sink into my heart and mind.

My friend and I may both be homeschooling moms, but each family is different.  We are created with varying weaknesses and strengths.  We have different backgrounds and experiences and have formed different expectations.  Thus, we stress different priorities.  Our family makeup is different.  It does make a difference whether you have been blessed with two children or seven, whether you have lots of young children and no older ones, or mostly older children and only one younger child, or two children just a year apart, etc.  Fathers’ work schedules are also different and the amount of time and support they provide varies.  God made each of our families unique.  And thus, each mom’s allotted work from God will be varied as well.  So, there should be NO comparison!  If I want to evaluate how and what we are doing as a family, then I should be comparing it against the Word of God.  What are His expectations of me and of our children?

A discerning man keeps wisdom in view,
but a fool’s eyes wander to the ends of the earth.
Proverbs 17:24   

I want to rid myself of this major joy stealer.   I want to keep a proper perspective, knowing that I am homeschooling for His glory.  How are our children’s hearts?  Are they growing in Christ?   I want to delight in my children- their strengths, quirks, and varied learning styles – the way God designed each of them to be.  I want to stop doubting the curriculum choices that I have already prayed over, look straight ahead, and proceed into a new school year with joy.   I want to create and maintain an attitude of gratitude.  I want to be faithful in the sphere God has placed me in and trust Christ for the outcome.  They are His children anyway.  I just get the privilege to be with them each day and point them to Him!

The law of the LORD is perfect,
reviving the soul.
The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy,
making wise the simple.
The precepts of the LORD are right, 
giving joy to the heart.
The commands of the LORD are radiant, 
giving light to the eyes.
Psalm 19:7-8

Lord, help me to keep my eyes focused on You.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...