In part four of the daily mommy vs teacher battle, I shared the tension felt between providing academic time with older children and the importance of seeing our younger children as blessings instead of hindrances during our school day.  I also shared some practical ways that we can show love to and include our littlest ones in the midst of the academics.

In this last battle, two opposing views are expressed. 
Can peace be found in this last battle?

Battle #5

Teacher – “I don’t feel like we are doing enough academically.”

Mommy – “I am feeling stifled by the academics and am burning out.”

Truce #5
– I need to consider several things if I (as the mother, teacher, and discipler) am feeling burned out.  There is a lot to ponder here and I think each could be a post in themselves!  However, I will keep it to just a few questions that I need to take into account…

• Does my husband think we are not ‘doing enough academics’ or is it coming from outside sources that I should probably not be using as my standard or from my own lofty expectations?  Although he is not typically present during the day to day, God has placed my husband as a protector over me and I should be seeking his insight.  
• Also, do the children seem to be progressing and learning in what they are studying?
• What does God’s Word command me to teach the children?  Am I obeying His Word in this regard? 
• Am I in the Word daily and staying secure to the vine?

-Remember that when all else fails, focus on the four essentials – Bible, reading, writing, and math!  It is foundational for all other areas of learning.

-Maybe older children can read historical fiction and biographies and/or do some science experiments following steps in a book or video (on their own).  There will be plenty of time to work on science and history in depth as those precious babies, toddlers, and preschoolers turn into elementary aged students – which will happen in the blink of an eye.

 
(above:  our 3 1/2 year old this fall)

The daily mommy vs teacher battles have been raging strong this school year in our home and I have come to the conclusion that homeschooling with many precious blessings is…

Just. Plain. HARD.

It is challenging physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually!
As Todd Wilson states in his book, Lies Homeschooling Moms Believe,

No one homeschools because it is easy. Most do it because they think it is the best.  That should comfort you, because the best things are almost always the hardest things. Think about it.  The things that are easiest are usually not very good for you, but those things that take blood, sweat, and tears are worth everything.  So take heart.   Homeschooling must be really, really good because it is really, really hard.

Knowing that homeschooling is hard can either make you cave into the temptation to give up and place all your school aged children on that big yellow bus that passes by each day OR  it can build perseverance and increase your faith.    I want to persevere.  I want to run a steady course in spite of the obstacles, the difficulties, and the discouragement.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 
(James 1:2-4)

But, how can I persevere?   It will only be through prayer and an unrelenting reliance on Christ’s power within me.  I can not do this in my own strength!

Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always. 
(1 Chronicles 16:11)

Through prayers and the strengthening by His Holy Spirit, I will also gain a peace that transcends all understanding, helping me to hold fast and to persevere.

You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.  (Isaiah 26:3)

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 
(Philippians 4:6-7)

Dear Jesus, let me not become weary in doing good, for you promise that at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.  (Galatians 6:9) 

Fellow homeschooling mamas, I’d love to hear about any ‘truces’ you have come up with that ease your mommy vs teacher battles!  May we encourage one another and spur each other on to persevere.

Have you missed any parts of this series?
The Daily Mommy vs Teacher Battle
Part 1 ~ outside time
Part 2 ~ strengthening relationships
Part 3 ~ life skills
Part 4 ~ including the younger children
Part 5 ~ persevering (current post)

So far, the mommy and teacher in me are making progress!

The warring parties have come to terms with seeing the importance of outside time, providing time to strengthen family relationships, and seeing life skills as essential as the academics.

In part four, we deal with the battle that has been pulling the most at my heart strings.

Battle #4

Teacher – “The older students need time for their group science, history, geography, Bible, and foreign language during the week!”

Mommy – “The younger children God has blessed us with need to play, be read to, and cared for lovingly by me and not viewed as distractions.”

Truce #4
– Always have open arms and a free lap for littlest ones.

-Start the day giving some undivided attention to the younger children first.

– Plan to have older siblings take turns playing/interacting with the youngest child(ren) for 15-20 minutes if attempting to work one on one with another child and the youngest is not doing well on his/her own.  (This also is part of the truce for battle number 2 and the goal of building strong relationships.)

– Do a group lesson, like Bible time, near a safe and contained play area so the youngest one can still be close, hear, and participate if they choose to.

-Do some group lessons during the youngest ones’ afternoon naptime.

Some thoughts regarding Toddlers
(around 18 months – a little over 2 1/2 years)
-Place some special ‘school time’ toys in a bin especially for use by the toddler  that are to only be brought out during school – You might want to include items like large beads, lacing cards, and laces; larger sized sticky backed foamies and paper; contact paper and cut paper shapes or tissue paper squares; blocks; shape sorters; knob puzzles; etc.

-Create a simple sensory bin with larger sized items.  Sensory bins are great for younger children to explore materials and gain practice with pouring and stirring.  (Precaution:  You still need to be present and alert to make sure little ones don’t place the objects in their mouths!)  Preschoolers enjoy these, too!

While struggling with wondering how to help our youngest toddler this year, I realized that we’ve had many years with toddlers around!  So, I did some digging and reminiscing =)   Here is just a quick peek at the types of things our other toddlers have enjoyed at this stage…..

– Place the toddler in a highchair or booster (for snack time or with some Color Wonder marker writing materials or with a few board books) as older children work at the table (regular work, messier projects, or a science experiment) during that time.

(above:   our 1 1/2 year old contentedly looking at books in his highchair as his kindergarten sister writes in her writing notebook and his 3 year old sister does her letter art)

Special thoughts regarding Preschoolers
(around 3 years old – 4 1/2  years old or so)
-For the preschooler, bring out the playdough, books on tape or CD; an art bin for encouraging creativity; floor puzzle; Lauri educational puzzles; small objects, a pair of small tongs, and a divided tray in order to freely sort and make patterns; a few carefully chosen educational videos (like Leapfrog or Bible songs); a stash of color, shape, and ABC books for easy perusal; chenille pipe cleaners and beads; a paint with water book; water color paints; their Joyful Heart Tune Bible verse binder to sing; Sticky Mosaics; Kumon early learning books; pattern blocks, etc.

(left:  our 3 year old completing a floor puzzle with ‘help’ from her 11 month old brother)

-Try to include the toddler(s) and preschooler(s) as much as possible!  Toddlers and preschoolers learn best by exploring, doing, and copying from others.  They WANT to be right where all the action is (and, as it just so happens, where a lot of the learning is occurring, too)!

(above:  our PreK and our 2 year old painting)

  (above:  our 22 month old helping his older
kindergarten aged sister with a fall project)

– Most of all, be flexible and willing to break the routine in order to love on the littlest ones and to give them the attention and care they need from mama!

Our foremost desire should not be to complete the academics on our ‘schedule’ for the day.  Although important, school work has to come second to  demonstrating kindness, gentleness, and compassion to the younger children God has blessed our family with!

Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.  (Philippians 2:4)

Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him.   (Psalm 127:3)

Other homeschool moms, how do you love on and tend to the unique needs of your littlest ones while making sure the academic needs of your older children are being met?

Have you missed any parts of this series?
The Daily Mommy vs Teacher Battle
Part 1 ~ outside time
Part 2 ~ strengthening relationships
Part 3 ~ life skills
Part 4 ~ including the younger children (current post)
Part 5 ~ persevering

Part two shed light on one of our goals of homeschooling – family unity.  In the midst of ‘doing’ school and life, we want to create stronger bonds, develop a spirit of unity, and magnify our Lord!

As we continue exploring the daily mommy vs teacher battle, notice how the teacher in me is starting to sound a bit repetitive…Yes, I can really be like that!

Battle #3

Teacher – “We can’t sacrifice any of our academics today.”

Mommy – ”We need to be able to develop more life skills
(chores, sewing, cooking, etc.)“

Truce #3
– Schedule 5 or 6 weeks of full school and then have 1 week for special projects like sewing, art, and cooking  OR  do 4 days of regular school and save one day a week to focus more on these skills.

(above:  our 2nd grader taking a turn on the sewing machine
this fall during our first project week!)

– Establish a plan for daily and weekly chores, making sure to include meal preparation and clean up.  We have attempted a couple different ways to implement chores – and often start strong.  However, our chores always seem to gradually disappear from our radar as academics take full swing.  I am taking a stand and we are starting them up again (especially those meal related chores)!

   
(above: from last school year…our 1st grader, 2 1/2 year old, 3rd grader, and PreK child excited to show off their chore cards!)

(above: what dinner clean up looks like currently
– Hopefully, we can do this consistently!) 

– Allow some free time in the afternoons for children to pursue and develop their interests…drawing, painting, hand sewing, etc.

Education is not  all about the academics.  Children need the opportunity to develop skills that they will have to utilize the rest of their lives!  Skills such as laundry, cooking, vacuuming, cleaning, organizing, sewing, etc. will be invaluable to the children as they grow into mature young adults.  In the process, they learn the value of hard work, responsibility, being a contributing member of the family, and diligence.

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.  (Colossians 3: 23)

How do you incorporate life skill learning into your day?

Have you missed any parts of this series?
The Daily Mommy vs Teacher Battle
Part 1 ~ outside time
Part 2 ~ strengthening relationships
Part 3 ~ life skills (current post)
Part 4 ~ including the younger children
Part 5 ~ persevering

In part one of the daily mommy vs  teacher battle, peace is being made by allowing our children to be able to get outside and play each day.  That was simple enough!  Now, let’s move on to something more substantial.  Today, in part two, we deal with relationship building opportunities.

Battle #2

Teacher – “We must stick to the academic tasks and stay on target today.”

Mommy – “How can I find adequate time to build strong relationships with the children and for them to grow closer together as well?”

Truce #2
– Schedule times for older kids to take a 15-20 minute break from their schoolwork to play with or read to the younger kids.

– Be encouraged by the natural tendencies the children have to talk, play, read, hug, and wrestle with each other – even if those few extra minutes ‘interrupt’  their schoolwork.

(above: our K child choosing
to read to her 17 month old sister)

– From time to time, invite the whole crew to dress up, choose hand puppets, or design some stick puppets and work together to put on a performance to share with daddy. (Of course, as in our family, the kids may take charge and come up with this idea on their own.) Be willing to give them time for planning, working through issues with one another, and for expressing their creativity!

-Do chores as a family – all working as a team toward achieving a goal.

(above:  even our 2 year old enjoyed
helping by dusting the baseboards)

-Institute a regular family fun night.  Play games, watch a movie, or have a Bible focused evening – all along with a fun snack!

– Have several fun educational days scattered throughout the year (100th day, Olympics related, family tea parties, etc) to maintain excitement in learning and to create family memories.

 
(above: our oldest trying out chopsticks at our family Asian themed tea)

–Make sure mama is remembering to wear a smile, is using pleasant tones, is looking at the children when they speak, and is giving hugs and encouraging feedback.  This will go a long way to building a positive relationship!

– Use a ‘Mama and Me’ notebook to write back and forth in to develop another form of communication to strengthen the bonds of trust and transparency. (I think this will be especially beneficial as the kids get older, but it is a good habit to start now.)

What is our goal?   Building family unity (in the midst of ‘doing’ school and life) so that we might glorify Christ!

May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.  (Romans 15:5-6)

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.  Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.   (Ephesians 4:2-3)

How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!  (Psalm 133:1)

Follow the entire series…
The Daily Mommy vs Teacher Battle
Part 1 ~ outside time
Part 2 ~ strengthening relationships (current post)
Part 3 ~ life skills
Part 4 ~ including the younger children
Part 5 ~ persevering

Like other homeschool moms with a handful of children ranging in age from toddler to entering double digits, I have two very important and intense roles that I must play each day – at the exact same time. 

I am a mother  AND  I am a teacher. 

This is both a daily blessing and a daily battle.  I realize that my roles as a mother and teacher are not really conflicting.  However, in my heart, they often feel that way.  This may be due to neglecting prayer for wisdom each day, believing lies about what my role as a mother and teacher should be, or by setting unreasonable expectations for myself and/or the children.  I truly love my children and I love home educating them, but some days I feel like I’m losing on both the mommy and the teacher front …. and sometimes, I feel as if my heart is being torn in two. 

Other homeschool mamas, do you ever feel this too?

Over the next several days, I will be sharing a few of the battles that are waged each day between the teacher and the mommy in me.  I’ll also be attempting to provide a few simple and practical solutions or ‘truces’  that might ease the sparring between the two and to help settle the conflict =) .

Feel free to comment and to add ways you’ve dealt with these issues in your own homeschool!

Battle #1
(This is actually the simplest battle to solve, and you’ll probably laugh…)

Teacher – “We must fit in all of our academic areas this day.”

Mommy – “The children and I must find time to breathe in the fresh air and be able to run and play outside!”

Truce #1
-Schedule daily outside recess, preferably a time when all of us, including mommy, can go outside!  Most public schools have recess for children.  So, our homeschooled kids (and younger siblings) can too!  Just because we are the only family in our neighborhood with children outside during school hours doesn’t mean it’s wrong!  Recess and play time outside has great benefits.  So, let the kids have some free play, suggest some fun relay races, kick the ball around, etc.  Just take a break from the school work and get outside!  The books and assignments can wait until after recess and everyone will be more refreshed (even mommy).

  (above:  our sweet 18 mo old learning to toss a ball earlier this year)

– Grab some clipboards, paper, and pencils, put the younger ones in a stroller or wagon, and head outdoors for a nature expedition!

 
(above: from 4 years ago…our almost 2 year old enjoying
some fresh air and nature exploration as his sisters go on a leaf hunt!)

Feel the gentle breeze.  Breathe deeply.  Enjoy God’s creation.
It is OKAY to take a break in the middle of, gulp, a school day!

Follow the entire series… 
The Daily Mommy vs Teacher Battle
Part 1 ~ outside time (current post)
Part 2 ~ strengthening relationships
Part 3 ~ life skills
Part 4 ~ including the younger children
Part 5 ~ persevering